The boy has been working the flower show at the Expo center for the past week. He was a big, bad foreman this year and had the luxury of working long hours, dressing in his ever-so-chic khaki pants uniform, and got to walk around with his walkie-talkie.
He would generally come home exhausted and regale me with the tales of the Flower Show mishaps. My personal favorites were the randy little lambs that liked to loudly “do it” when the show closed for the night and the lights went down. Or the swans that managed to escape from their enclosure and wreak havoc on the show (after hours) by running around and “pooping” every where. The mental image of the burly, heavily tattooed crew trying to corral the swans was good for a giggle or three.
One of the “perks” to the show is the occasional free ticket. Thus, I made plans to take my aunt and uncle to the flower show. Aside from the various floral arrangement displays and the typical “award winning” plants, there are numerous vendor booths where one can waste copious amount of money.
I met my aunt and uncle at the show on Saturday. We wandered around and looked at the various exhibitions and of course made a pit stop at the “horny” animal enclosure. After a small bite to eat, we headed in the direction of the vendors. We did a bit of “grazing” at the various shops that were offering “free samples”…and then voila, we landed at that crazy, chubby, chatty booth lady’s booth. It was a flower stand and my aunt wanted to purchase a few things. The boy had joined us by this time and he was looking quite handsome in his “uniform”. But – as always, his flamed 666 tattoo was peeking out just above the collar of his T-shirt.
My aunt was milling about the booth choosing the items she wanted and my uncle was off to the side listening to crazy, chubby, chatty booth lady go on-and-on about nothing of importance. Suddenly, the boy caught her eye. Not realizing that we were all together – and not noticing my engagement ring, natch – she proceeded to say, and I quote, verbatim, the following to my poor uncle:
CRAZY CHUBBY CHATTY BOOTH LADY: “Ohhh my, look at that handsome boy right there!”
UNCLE: Stifled smile and nod as he looks over at the boy.
CRAZY CHUBBY CHATTY BOOTH LADY: “He’s so hot he has flames coming off his neck!”
UNCLE: Nodding uncomfortably as he looks at the boys tattoo (the flames the crazy chubby chatty booth lady is referencing.)
CRAZY CHUBBY CHATTY BOOTH LADY: “It’s a good thing I’m a volunteer firefighter. I am gonna do the stop, drop and roll on his ass!”
UNCLE: Throwing up a bit in his mouth and slowly backing away from crazy chubby chatty booth lady.
Ahhh, between the amorous animals and the crazy chubby chatty booth lady, I had a great time. My uncle, however, is in therapy!
