My petition to save our brain cells!

Being that I have chosen New England as a home base, the schizophrenic weather patterns have driven me to watch the morning weather/radar reports on a daily basis. It is not abnormal for me to have the T.V. playing in the background as I dab on my foundation and lip gloss.

And here our story begins……

Once again the world waits for news on the latest and greatest story. Our eyes scan every magazine cover, every newspaper headline and wait for the interruption to our favorite T.V. program.

Britney Spears has been hospitalized!

C’mon people! This is verging on the ridiculous!!!!

Here are some interesting ideas for a HEADLINE news story:

1) The upcoming Super Tuesday primaries

2) Giuliani and Edwards dropping out of the race (as if they had a chance – but news, nonetheless)

3) Umm….this war thing over in Iraq – maybe you’ve heard about it once or twice?

4) The failing economy and proposed rebates (as if $600 would do much but pay down a bit of debt acquired due to the failing economy, but I digress).

5) The upcoming presidential election and the countdown of the last days of Bush (woohoo!)

Those are just a few tidbits from the top of my li’l ol’ noggin’. You see, I am losing IQ points on a daily basis as I am inundated with the latest celebrity sighting, rehab visit, panty-less car exit, and so on.

Are we so celebrity obsessed that these stories are more important than actual events that could make or break our very existence? “Celebrity” being a term coined by the media as I find nothing celebratory about any of these people with the exception of removing their antics from the front page.

Years ago the old Hollywood studio system churned out actors and actresses in a ready-made way. They came replete with a made-up back story and their sightings were carefully placed publicity ploys. Any scandal was duly swept under the rug and the public could enjoy their latest idol with nary a thought to their dastardly doings.

We need to bring this system back!!

I am sick and tired of these celeb-retards and fallen star stories. Celebrity scandal should not be front page news fodder but rather a Page Six blurb that one must dig for and seek out.

I do not need to turn on the news and see a police motorcade escort for some fallen pop-tart. I need to be informed and aware of the real issues that this world is facing. Whether or not Paris Hilton is wearing under wear or Nicole Richie eats a salad does not a news story make!

I am starting a petition! Let’s send all these fallen “idols” and paparazzi to a deserted island. We will air drop a supply of underwear (which apparently is desperately needed as money does not seem to buy these necessary accoutrements). They can then live their life as two tribes – a Survivor-esque reality existence, if you will. The famous-for-nothing-important tribe and the scandal obsessed photogs who chase them.

Then perhaps we can return to our regularly scheduled programming – the game of REAL life, or something of that sort.

Who’s with me?